Whether you knew your spouse was manipulative before you married him or her or you didn't find out until later, it is crucial that you protect yourself. Sure, you may love him or her, but his or her actions have just become too much for you and you are seeking a divorce. Since your spouse is conniving, here are a few tips to help empower yourself to rise about him or her in the divorce:

1. Stay on Top of Your Finances, Including Tax Returns.

From the beginning of your marriage, you hopefully took care of the finances. One of the biggest mistakes people make is not having a clue about the household finances. This potentially puts you at an unfair advantage in the divorce when it comes to settling financial issues. Therefore, you need to make sure that you have copies of any and all financial records. This includes retirement accounts, brokerage, savings, account statements, tax returns, etc. Keep a close eye out for any missing money that was used without your permission, as money that is illegally used or moved can usually be located with the help of a forensic accountant.

2. Who's Going to File This Year's Tax Return?

So, you both decided to dissolve your marriage, and now it is time to decide how to proceed with filing for federal income taxes. The worst thing you can do is hand this task off to your soon-to-be-ex spouse. Instead, you want a say in what happens. You should work together to determine the tax options that benefit both of you, not just one of you. An attorney or mediation expert can provide assistance during this stage. Ultimately, you just want to make sure that you both receive a fair share of the potential refund.

3. Take Into Consideration Your Long-Term Financial Security.

One thing that many spouses tend to do is seek spousal support and then heavily rely on that alimony following the divorce. Unfortunately, this can leave you financially dependent on your ex, which is the last thing that you truly want. To avoid this, make sure that a divorce settlement is drafted that covers the long-term plans of you and your self, including your children's college tuition. At the same time, make sure that it does not leave you praying to receive that check month after month.

4. Never Trash-Talk to Your Ex on Social Media.

Whether you are frequent user of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or all of the above, try to limit your use during the divorce. You don't want to run the risk of trash-talking your spouse, which would give them fuel to add to the fire in court. Plus, in the end, it really won't make you feel better.

5. Consult with and Hire an Experienced Attorney.

The best thing you can do when you decide to move forward with a divorce is to hire a professional lawyer like Robert E Long & Associates Ltd who is experienced with the laws of divorce. He or she can use the law to help you rise up to the occasion and make sure that you do not fall prey to your soon-to-be-ex.